A superwoman is a woman who KNOWS that she’s the business. She is unapologetically successful. She understands that imperfection is perfection to a beautiful perspective. 

 

She holds herself to a standard of authenticity, not perfection, accepting that she won't always make the right decisions, she may screw up sometimes and will probably experience a few challenges. But she understands that failure is not a death sentence because at least she has given her best and has learned. 

 

A superwoman can be a wife, a partner, a mother, a successful individual but she juggles around these roles successfully. And, she has a social life, look after her health, and embrace an amazing lifestyle. She has a secret and a few strategies that she is joyfully willing to share empowering and inspiring us all. 

 

See you soon xoxo

Steph 

 

 A lot of people are afraid to say what they want. That’s why they don’t get what they want.”

 

Madonna (one of the superwomen)

***

 

Stéphanie Tumba + Thrive Global

 

#Superwomen is our bi-weekly show created by Stéphanie Tumba in partnership with Thrive Global. Stéphanie is thrilled to interview successful women of all ages in 195 countries worldwide. 

 

Stéphanie and her guests share the authentic life of a woman entrepreneur from her love life to her path to the top. These #superwomen will share their secrets to happiness, success, motivation, creativity, productivity, love, health, contribution, and fulfillment. 

 

Get inspired, get empowered, and go grow stronger. The biggest adventure you can ever take is to live the life of your dreams. 

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The Top 8 Regrets of Middle Age

What do you regret?

Not getting the chance to say goodbye? Staying too long in a bad relationship? Letting go of a great one? Poor work or financial choices? Or spending too much time agonising over friends and being liked, your body, your looks, your weight?



Regret is widely touted as one of the most common negative emotions — and my clinical observation backs that up. Most people have regrets: they long to turn back time, wish certain aspects of life had gone differently — or ponder “what might have been”.

While re-reading palliative care nurse Bronnie Ware’s The Top 5 Regrets of the Dying I began to wonder what people most regret in middle age — supposedly when they still have time to do something about it.

So I carried out a survey…

Over the next month I surveyed clients and friends — anyone I bumped into — aged 35–60 years: around 50 people. There were no control groups and no rules — just a single question: what’s your biggest regret?

I expected the usual: not spending enough time with loved ones, taking the wrong career path, regrets about money (spending it unwisely or not saving it), regrets around the use of time, hurting others or behaving badly.

I got some of that. But I was surprised by the number of big, thorny regrets that had clung to people, in some cases shaped their lives and could still make them cry — and huge doses of self-blame.

Here’s what they said.

The Top 8 Regrets of Middle Age

1. Not doing the “right” thing when someone died. Regrets related to death cut the deepest. They included not being there for someone close to them when they died; not being able to prevent a friend’s suicide, having a fight with dad just before he died in a car crash.

Several people wished they’d tried harder to improve or “fix” a relationship while they still had a chance. Or spent more time with someone they loved. Those regrets stayed close to the surface, were still upsetting. It had made them more conscious of their close relationships, of nurturing those that mattered.

2. Spending too much time worrying and being afraid. People regretted hiding from their feelings (or burying them), not speaking up for their own needs and desires, trying too hard to please others — or backing away from opportunities they could have taken. Fear, or a “lack of confidence”, had led to regret around things they had NOT done, like taking risks, trying different things, dating more people, pursuing less popular career paths and traveling.

3. Not having enough adventure (staying in the comfort zone). Clinging to security; playing it “safe”. Taking a few risks with their lives and now feeling the weight of responsibility — kids, partners, mortgages, paging parents, debt, work pressure — that it was too late.

4. Staying too long in a bad situation (work/relationships). Over-staying in a job they hated or were bored with, or clinging to an unsatisfactory (even toxic) relationship was common. So was loving the wrong person — and then having their heartbroken by them.

5. Not being smarter with money. This was almost everyone, in some way or another. Even those who seemed to have plenty had regrets about how they’d used it — or purchases they should have made, like property. Perhaps evidence that, beyond personal grief, money worries us the most.

6. Not getting more education (or choosing the wrong path). Wishing they’d had the determination to study more or the courage to do what was in their heart. In all cases this was because they didn’t like the path they were on now — but didn’t know how (or felt it was too risky) to change it.

7. Lost opportunities. These regrets were often pegged to things beyond their control. Like being unable to have a child. Not finding a loving life partner. Being rejected by the person they loved. Or throwing away a great relationship. Several expressed their regret in marrying/having a family too young and not fulfilling their work/career aspirations.

8. Doing stupid or mean things. Hurting others (lovers, friends and parents), abuse of alcohol and drugs, too much sex with the wrong people. One person admitted being a bully. Others referred to being too self-focused. Or dumb. Or naive. Or inexperienced. Or avoidant. Or unable to apologise. Things that can still make us cringe. Things we should all be better at in middle age. But are not always.


What’s Your Greatest Regret?

Regret can be useful. It makes us aware of the mistakes we’ve made; the not-so-great ways we’ve treated others or ourselves. And, if we allow it, it can help guide our future choices.

But it can also keep our focus on things we’ve “failed” to do, rather than all that we have done — and could still do. While the past informs who we are, it’s not possible to live fully while looking over our shoulders.


Have an amazing weekend, go-getters and #superwomen!


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